Master, my Love, my Heart,
I love that you worry about me. I love that you are concerned for the amount of time we have together. I love that you are concerned about hurting me because you’re poly needs are more extensive than mine.
Please hear me, I see you. I believe I have a pretty good grasp of what you need to be happy. Perhaps not all of it but certainly a fair amount. I know that I cannot meet all of your needs. I know that you need others. I truly do. I know that you need to be needed. I know that you need community. I know that you need to converse with those who understand you. I know that you need to be looked on and respected as a community elder and adviser. These are the very same things I repeat to MsOhio when she comes to me concerned about stepping on my toes. I tell her that she meets needs for you that I cannot, because she does.
Do these things take time away from me? On occasion, sure. Do I experience jealousy? Sure. Do I want you for mine, to keep you all to myself, to have and gloat over? Yes, that too. All of these things are purely selfish and not who I am for you. I recognize that I hold a special place in your heart. I know that you will always have time for me, no matter how many others there are. I know that I am your Alpha and you are my One. We are life mates.
I need to be a reliable source for your happiness, if that means that I step aside to enable you to spend time with another, then so be it. It is my goal to never be a source of stress for you. I know, I know, I hear you But I like stress. I’m not talking about Master induced stress because it’s fun. I’m talking about I really don’t want to tell her about this because she is going to lose it. Yeah, that kind of stress.
I am not saying I will never be jealous. I’m not saying I will never be upset that you aren’t available when I’m missing you. I am not saying that the manifestations of my jealousy will never touch you. What I am saying is that I will keep them to a minimum. I am saying that if I experience these things I will tell you (hopefully) with a minimum of drama. I will use “I language”. I am saying I will not take you on a guilt trip for needing whatever it is that makes you happy. I am saying that I will endeavor to recover/adjust quickly.
I need your happiness. Your happiness above all else. I may not have much training – I may not be the most experienced slave but even I know that.