30 Days of Submission #9 & #10

9) Do you accept and/or expect structure, rules and limits as a part of your submission? How do you feel about them?
<sigh> These are becoming repetitive. This has been answered here.

10) Does any element of BDSM occur as a part of your submissive relationships? How do you feel about BDSM? Is it core to your submission, peripheral or non-existent (other than the submission part)?
To answer this without first explaining the definition of BDSM (for the uninitiated) would be pointless. Here’s a handy-dandy graphic with an at-a-glance explanation.

Definition of BDSM - graphic

Now, on to the question … All of the above is incorporated into my relationship, though not in equal parts. As a slave, the depth of my relationship with my Master is different than the typical D/s dynamic. At the core of the M/s dynamic is the spiritual connection between a Master and His slave. All else is secondary.

How I feel about BDSM is difficult to define. It is such an integral part of my life that I don’t know how to separate it from self. Asking me how I feel about it is like asking how I feel about who I am.

I can say it this way, I suppose: Before my return to BDSM last year I was miserable. I had been for a very long time. When I came back, there was a sigh of relief … of “Oh, that’s right. This is who I am. Everything will be ok now.” Returning to who I am, at minimum, saved my marriage. I am immeasurably happier now.

I am incredibly fortunate to have found my Master. He has shown me so much. He uncovers parts of me that I did not know existed. He is stripping away the layers of my old life that I no longer need. I will occasionally hold onto a layer with both hands and play tug-of-war as if my life depended on it. Some things are difficult to let go of. When I do let go, and discover what has been hidden underneath, I will often shake my head at how well He sees me. I am a better person for having Him in my life.


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