I never said that to your face though I was well within my rights to do so. I was also well within my rights to carve it in your flesh and follow it up with my initials to make very sure you never forgot who put it there. I never raised a finger to you though no one would have blamed me if I had.
Fuck you for taking this from me, from my Master, this wonderful man who deserves absolutely everything He could possibly want/need/desire from me.
Fuck you for making this seemingly simple thing traumatically hard every. single. time.
Fuck you for making me feel weak and impotent when I even think about having to do it one more time.
Fuck you for stealing gratification no matter the cost.
Fuck you for making me feel like it was my fault.
Fuck you for making me feel like something was wrong with me.
Fuck you for making me feel like something IS wrong with me now, some 20 years on. That deserves two of them: Fuck you and fuck you again!
Fuck you that I have to think about you every day. The memory of what you did will be eradicated. I will make it so.
I will take this back from you. I will overcome this limitation. You no longer have power over me. This last vestige of your impact on my life will soon be gone. You didn’t deserve me then and you don’t deserve me now. So fuck you and fuck the baggage you left behind.