List ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
1. Stop lying to me. You are damaging our relationship in ways you cannot possibly understand.
2. I carry the horrible things you say to me when you vent for far longer than you realize. I believe them about myself because you have said them. I know it makes you feel better in those moments. They are damaging and hurtful. Please stop it. To paraphrase Woody Allen: If you believe the good things they say about you, you also have to believe the bad.
3. I know it hurts you that I severely limit our communication. I would talk to you more often and for a longer duration if you truly cared what was going on with me. I am not an obligation. You did this. I have to protect myself from the person you’ve become.
4. How could you? After the unconditional support I gave you. After being your liaison for so long. How could you say that to me?
5. Yes, I’ve changed. I’ve become a person you probably don’t recognize. I know this isn’t easy for you. I love you. Thank you for allowing me to be this me. I’m much happier because you allow it.
6. My relationship with you shaped who I am today. Thank you for being present in my life in a way she could not.
7. I miss you. You were a terrific friend for a very long time. You literally saved my life. I wish you had stuck around. I hope you’re happy with your life choices.
8. I don’t know how you do it. If I were in your position I would like to believe I would handle myself with the grace you’ve shown. Thank you for being who you are. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your lives.
9. I miss you. I don’t know how I would have gotten through University without you. It sucks that you chose to stay with him. I see him for what he is. I want to be wrong. I hope I am. The way he has isolated you speaks volumes. I hope it goes no further than that. I know the patterns.
10. You loved to tell people the story of how I said “You probably won’t see most of these people again.” You thought it was so funny. Look at where we are now. Was I wrong?