Random questions from the blogosphere

What stereotype would you label yourself as being?
The quiet type

When is the last time you played the air guitar?
never.

Have you ever bitten your toenails?
Good god no!

How often do you clean out your ears?
This is wholly dependent on whether I get water in them while showering.

Do you have any strange phobias?
I do not have any phobias as they are clinically defined. Things I’m afraid of? Yes. Things that disturb me greatly? Sure.

Have you ever been dared to do something you totally regretted?
Nope

Do you have an innie or an outtie?
innie

Have you ever peed your pants after age 8?
no

Do you know how to drive a car?
Yes

Favorite website?
This is a tie between pinterest and fetlife

What is your favorite sport?
PBR: Bull riding

Who did you last talk to?
My son

What is one thing that annoys you?
Irrationality

One best friend or many good friends?
I would like to have many good friends but that has not been my reality for roughly ten years….. So, one best friend.

Nicest car you have ever driven?
Hmm well I’ve only ever driven my own vehicles and they have all been modest in both make and model. I did love my PT Cruiser. That one I guess.

Have you ever skipped school?
yes

Have you ever been dumped?
yes

One rumor that has been spread about you?
In high school I was rumored to be conceited when the polar opposite was true.

Do you read much?
I LOVE to read. My brain no longer processes it well. I still try in fits and starts.

Do you believe in love at first sight?
No.

Have you ever failed a class? Why?
Yes, Algebra. Because I’m stupid.

Hug or kiss?
Can’t I have both? If I’m forced to choose I would take the hug.

Last phone call?
Hubby

Weirdest thing you have ever eaten?
Jellyfish

Weekdays or weekends?
Weekdays

Do you study the Bible?
No

Mints or chewing gum?
Mints

Shorts or pants?
Pants

Smart or Beautiful?
Smart!

What’s your favorite store?
Amazon.com – they have everything and exceptional customer service to back it up

Coffee or tea?
Blech! Neither

Do you have children? Do you wish to have more?
I do have. I do NOT want more.

What if you had three wishes – what would you wish for?
1. a teleportation machine
2. independent wealth
3. three more wishes

Do you shower daily?
Usually, though I’ve been known to miss a day here and there if I’m ill or in prolonged bondage.

What is your favorite type of music?
Country

What’s your family like?
Mostly content with the standard bumps along the way

If you could go anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?
Somewhere quiet and undemanding where sleep comes easily and the food is both precooked and plentiful.

Who is the coolest person you know?
My Master

What did you eat for breakfast this morning?
A blueberry muffin

Do you have any tattoos and/or piercings?
Just pierced ears.

When was the last time you cried?
A couple of hours ago

Have you ever faked being sick?
As a child, yes.

What was the last lie you said?
I’m fine.

Have you ever cried during a movie/book?
Oh, heck yeah. Both. Often.

Have you ever been in a car accident?
Yes. I don’t recommend it.

What is your favorite sport to play?
Bwahahahahahahaha. Things you can’t unsee!

Have you ever made a prank phone call?
Yes, once during childhood

Do you believe in karma?
yes

Are you religious?
no

What is the best compliment you have ever received?
That I helped someone recenter themselves just by being me and being around them.

What is your greatest weakness?
A pervasive lack of reliable memory

What is your perfect pizza?
Stuffed crust cheese

Who makes you laugh?
Master and Sheldon Cooper are tied for reliable laughs

Have you ever stolen anything?
yes

Are you a morning person or a night person?
night

Have you ever had a nightmare?
“A” nightmare?!?! The very thought of just one nightmare borders on the absurd. Nightmares are the norm for me.

Do you dream a lot?
It is exceedingly rare for me NOT to dream in some form.

Have you ever attempted suicide?
no

Have you ever written a love letter?
Yes

Who is your favorite person to talk to?
Master

How do you vent your anger?
I rarely vent in the traditional sense. I have been known to curse. Most often, if I am extremely angry, I cry.

Have you ever been on a diet?
yes

Have you ever cut yourself on purpose?
no

Do you prefer talking on the phone or online?
phone

Are you happy with the person you are becoming?
Yes.

Do you consider yourself popular?
I consider myself nearly a hermit. That’s the same thing, right?

Learning

Prompt: What’s your learning style? Do you prefer learning in a group and in an interactive setting? Or one-on-one? Do you retain information best through lectures, or visuals, or simply by reading books?

I am a visual learner. I can talk about something for hours. I can fully understand it however, I will retain very little if I don’t have a visual anchor. I stand a much better chance of remembering if I involve as many of my senses as possible.

It is critical that I learn in an interactive environment. It takes a minimum of twice as long for me to comprehend something if I’m sitting by myself trying to figure it out. There are things I cannot learn at all by just reading about them, any mathematical concept being among those things.

Though I can learn in a group, I tend to learn more quickly one-on-one. In groups, I can get distracted by something I don’t understand because I can’t give voice to it immediately. I will turn the thing over and over in my mind looking for an answer, paying attention to the thing instead of what is being said, potentially missing critical information.

Conversely, in a one-on-one situation I feel pressure to be exceptionally bright. I can get distracted by whether or not the instructor is frustrated with my pace, if I don’t grasp what is being taught in what I feel is a decent amount of time. I do recognize this becomes a self fulfilling prophecy as my cyclical thinking hijacks my learning process.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….
Today I am grateful for: decorations
Today’s funny moment: n/a
Sad moment: DH choosing football over family
Protocol: Teaching by example – responding to a one line note with a note including proper salutations, punctuation and sentence structure.
Water: 4 liters
Corset: 24″ am, 24″ pm
Hood: n/a

Ten Best

Prompt: Sing your own praises for a change; brainstorm your 10 best qualities, attributes and quirks.

1. I am a good human being.
2. I raise my child with love, manners, and the intent that he become a productive member of society.
3. I am the rock everyone in my family leans on.
4. If I give my word, I keep it.
5. When I appreciate people in my life, I tell them.
6. I am creative.
7. I have exceptional will power.
8. I am able to help people believe in themselves.
9. I aspire to excel.
10. I love unabashedly, with my entire body, and without fear.

…………………………….
Today I am grateful for: Art
Today’s funny moment: “Mom, you need to know the winter carnival is a requirement.” Was I born yesterday? Apparently he thinks so. I had to laugh.
Sad moment: LM – Master Manipulator & Liar Extraordinaire
Protocol: n/a
Water: 4 liters
Corset: 24″ am, 24″ pm
Hood: 2 hours

30 Days of Submission #17

17) What does trust mean to you in the context of submission? 

Trust. A tiny word with mammoth meaning and impact.

In the context of my submission, I must trust my Master implicitly. When We play, I am trusting that He will know how much is enough. I trust that He has Our best interests in His heart. I trust that when He is pushing far beyond what We have ever done, that He knows what I am capable of, what We are capable of together. I trust that He will care for me mentally and physically – before, during and after.

In some forms of Our play I am, quite literally, completely incapacitated for multiple hours. My life is in His hands until He gives it back to me. It is impossible to explain the depth of emotion – the strength of bond – that comes with this level of play. While I belong to Him always, in these particular play sessions, I am His utterly, to do with as He pleases. My trust in Him is perfect. I know with certainty that no harm will come to me. He will not allow it.

Additionally, I recognize that He has bestowed His trust on me. He has to trust that I will follow through with all of my training. That I will maintain my written journal and all other tasks. That as His property, I represent Him, conducting myself as if He were standing beside me always. That before and during play I will communicate in all of the ways We have established – even if that means scrapping an entire play session, even if the play was to be a multi-day session. The trust He has in me is equally as important as my trust in Him.

Outside of play I seek His council. I trust His wisdom. Acting on His advice has changed several aspects of my life for the better and will doubtless continue to do so. My life is enriched for being His.

……………………………………………………………………….
Today I am grateful for: patience
Today’s funny moment: n/a
Sad moment: LM’s shenanigans
Protocol: I had no idea there were several levels of protocol associated with the military and the national anthem.
Water: 4 liters
Corset: 24″ am, 23.5″ pm
Hood: 3 hours

Prompt Stress

Prompt: 10 things that really stress me out are…

  • Being among many people – even if I have met the majority of them prior to the occasion – even if all those I know are perfectly nice people
  • Rush hour traffic – the accident that caused my TBI was during morning rush hour.
  • Being a front seat passenger – stress in this situation is amplified if I don’t know the driver extremely well
  • Entertaining in my home – I strongly dislike anyone outside my immediate family unit in my personal space. When social obligations require others to be in my home it can stress me to the breaking point.
  • Being in environments that cause my routine to be disrupted – I am a creature of habit, nearly to the point of ritual. This is born of memory issues. If I do it (whatever “it” is) the same way every single time it is far less likely anything will be forgotten.
  • Not getting adequate sleep – This is two-fold: My already poor memory becomes significantly worse if I am not rested AND my thinking becomes fuzzy. I do not remember instructions that include multiple steps (usually more than two). I will often forget what I’m doing, even if it’s obvious. I have had the experience of holding my toothbrush in my hand and not remembering what to do with it. Disconcerting to say the least.
  • Grocery shopping – Too many people and the probability of forgetting things. Yes, even if they are on the list. Yes, even when I check the list. No, I don’t understand how it happens.
  • Any situation in which I will be judged for any reason.
  • Attending social functions alone – by necessity I have learned to cope with this and have improved a bit in the last year or so. I am still stressed as much as before. I’ve learned to hide it and function from a slightly less angsty place.
  • Being watched – In any situation other than a well rehearsed performance, I find this extremely difficult to tolerate. Any one, any where, any time. I’m not even comfortable watching myself. I spend as little time in front of the mirror as possible. The only exception to this is in the dressing room when the entire cast is shoulder-to-shoulder in front of the mirror. Somehow that makes it acceptable.

……………………………………………………………………………..
Today I am grateful for: Living with two males who are smart enough to feel the “Leave me the fuck alone” vibe and who are also smart enough to do it.
Today’s funny moment: n/a
Sad moment: going over December’s schedule
Protocol: n/a
Water: 4 liters
Corset:24″ am, 23″pm
Hood: I worked with the newest hood on the overnight. This hood does not cause ear pain with ear buds (for white noise) as with the kissing hood. I woke after two hours and decided to see how well seated the ear buds were and what it would take to dislodge them. They were seated relatively well however, I do not believe they will stay in place during play. Several stout tugs on the wire had them out the base of the hood which was snugly laced and tied.